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Our newlywed adventure continues as we are trying to have a baby. Being over 40 – this means that it is a little more complicated than it would be when I was in my 20s. There are obvious risks and issues. But after a clean bill of health, lots of discussions, and late nights, we have decided to try.

This past month I was started on Clomid. As far as fertility help, it is pretty simple. I take a pill everyday for 5 days and then Matthew and I do what we do.

Side effects are not too bad. My Mr. says I am sort of hulking out more than usual and pretty moody. I have some mild back and abdominal pain.. but nothing at all terrible. Just feel like I am on extended PMS plus. I did see this as a magic pill. I don’t exactly know why when my Doc told me that we should not worry that it could still take a few months… that I just felt like, this is it. I will take these magic pills and like jack and the bean stalk – I will have my magical outcome just like that.

This week it became very obvious that I am in fact, NOT PREGNANT. I wish I could say that I took it in stride. I didnt. I spent some time crying my face off and my Mr. spend most the evening just giving me loves as I moped and ate chocolates while watching Gordon Ramsay. Today I am ok. I have mourned and now I am all good as they say. We are getting ready for round two of clomid and yes… when the time is right we will get to work. (good work if you can get it by the way). The good news is that my cycle changed which means that the clomid seems to have worked. I am going to really try to be more relaxed now. Enjoy the journey as they all say. I know in my heart that when the time is right… Matthew and I will have our sweet little one on the way. Until then… we will just keep being the crazy little family we already are.

So our baby journey continues.

Until then.. its canning seasons so keeping myself busy hasn’t been too hard.

Thanks for all your love and prayers.

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